Millionaire Success Habits with Dean Graziosi and Lewis Howes

all right welcome everyone to the school greatness podcast we have a living legend Dean gracio seen in the house any here man this is awesome yeah I’m excited I uh first found out about you probably haven’t know ten or fifteen years ago from TV yeah late night when I was probably broke and depressed trying to figure out about what I was doing my life and we’re on there interviewing talking about a book and real estate stuff I remember you in front of a house talking about how you generated like or this house like someone made 30 grand from or something like a hundred thirty thousand or something like that vaguely and I met you the first time I don’t have to remember this I think was probably five or six years ago at Josh bazan he had a mastermind oh yeah yeah in Austin yes that’s right and I was wondering where I met you the first thing I was I could briefly justshanz and then I met you again I think for like a hot second through fan Merril okay I believe one of his events or something yeah I think we met briefly but this is so now we’re here so now we’re here and thanks to Joe polish for connecting us yeah and I know he’s amazing yeah total connector right exactly I’ve got a lot of questions for today like you wrote a book called millionaire success habits make sure you guys go check this out we’ll tell you where to go at the end here it’s the the gateway to wealth and prosperity and you are a New York Times best seller you’ve written a number of books five books right yeah and why why this book most of it in real estate my books why a book about my inner success habits you know I it’s a great question the first book I ever wrote my first New York Times bestseller was called totally fulfilled hmm I was in the business and I read it now and you know it’s like you look back if you’re someone who grows I look back at that now no Michael Ridge can I take it off the shelves right yeah but I wrote that book because I had already been in the education business for ten years and when you know when you find out when you obsess on getting people results right and which everybody watching whatever you do in life like there’s nothing better than being passionate about what you do and when I look where people would fall short on doing a real estate deal or taking their life to the next level or or taking action it had nothing to do with my tactical skills on what I taught in real estate so what I was teaching was exactly what I did I literally you know it helped to go to the story but I was lived in a trailer park I was homeless with my dad for year we lived in a bathroom I went through that I didn’t go to past high school I had dyslexia all this stuff that a lot of us have gone through I know that the strategies worked in real estate when I got so frustrated I’m like I don’t need to write a real estate book I need to write a book to get out of their own way to get over the obstacles to just use the crap that I’m giving you so you could take action because they was have the strategies but they want to get the result I’d say they couldn’t you know the first obstacle they turn around go backwards right first time it doesn’t work you know limiting beliefs people from the outside the stories they tell themselves all the things that we all know and if you if your audiences Washington’s they get a lot of that stuff so I wrote that book and then went on to write four or five five more real estate books and blessed to sell lots of millions of books put sold and then in the last couple years it just been on my heart to share the the process in which I went through and then being blessed to be friends with really successful people and billionaires and you the more success you have the more you realize it’s less shifts in your life than you would think I think when you’re struggling and you want more if you think back to when you’re on the couch at your sister’s house you’ve probably thought there was a hundred or 200 things you had a change about you you had to discover the latest and greatest and technology and all the things the complexity of today’s world right we’re overloaded with information we’re all overloaded with delivery systems of everybody anybody’s in marketing it’s like do I do Facebook and if it’s Facebook is at Facebook live is it we get all so much complexity with the delivery systems and we forget that it really boils down to about a handful things handful of things that make someone successful or not so through my years and touch the lives of millions of people and reading tens of thousands of posts and doing live events you realize that people are just lacking these habits that they could shift and that that’s what I got on this obsession about 18 months ago and that’s why that’s why millionaire success habits who was your biggest mentor growing up you know I would say I didn’t have a lot of mentors growing up I was I was probably more running away from the life I had you know I hated watching my parents struggle I mean all they were worried about was money right right there was no time for coaching Little League and I was telling you I’ll take more my daughters here with me today too or first business trip when she turned 10 she’s here in the business trip but you know I get to coach Little League I get to go to every dance sytle I played at the park in the middle a day I watched my parents not have any of those options they were great parents they just didn’t have those options so I think I was running away from the pain of money and broke and all that but that I would have to say 18 years ago Tony Robbins made a massive impact in my life just I mean he’s one of my dearest friends in the world now but 18 years ago it was his course and a journal Royce it’s some day I hope to meet him you know and right so I would say that he made a big impact on me for sure hey Z Wow okay was there how did you get out of the I guess the scarcity mindset or that scarce life you were living in where you’re in the trailer park or you were living in a bathroom and your parents have these conversations how did you shift it was there information you learned from Tony or from someone else that helped you get started you know it’s funny I’ve been asked that question before and I don’t have a specific epiphany like oh this one moment I can remember thinking throughout high school and even in my early 20s maybe not my early 20s I flipped pretty quick right around 20 years old I didn’t go to college right I didn’t go to college I barely got out of high school but I can remember thinking in high school whatever years that was is that you know I hope someday I can get a job and make a thousand bucks a week and just get by I’m not that smart cuz I had trouble reading I still can’t read great but I did I just had dyslexia is what I think it’s been diagnosed now but I still can’t comprehend good when I read but I didn’t realize I was an audible and visual learner I could listen to a book and I’ll memorize the whole book I can watch somebody on stage and emulate that if it fits my life but sometimes we’re judged by a scorecard that doesn’t it’s an outdated scorecard right so not only did we not have money I also felt well I’m not smart enough to go to school and something changed around 17 18 years old just something flipped and I just I noticed and this is going to sound like it’s a pitch for the book and it’s not but I noticed the people in my town this little tiny town I grew up in upstate New York the people that had money the people that seemed happier I don’t know behind the scenes but they seemed happier more fulfilled they were more relaxed like life just happened like they were walking up a ladder instead of like my family seemed like they’re running on a treadmill you know it’s like we’re going fast we’re not going anywhere so why is this guy and this woman is town doing so well and I remember just obsessing on hmm and and what I noticed it was I didn’t I didn’t call it habit so I’d love to say I figured this out once or twice but I realizes they just did different things than my family and my friends were doing and I just started obsessing on that and I was young enough and naive enough to just think I could do it well you know I mean sometimes you wish you could give that gift to somebody in the 20s 30s 50s 70s writers I had the gift of being naive and a little dumb and not listening to anybody I mean I was in 1998 I did my first infomercial well and most twenty years ago yeah in 1998 Phil my first one and my sister my daughters and my daughter sitting here like this my sister drove from Virginia because by then so in 1998 I had I had an apartments I had a collision shop I had an auto sales and I was building houses well doing it from from that broke kid I was doing how are you when you started that I was probably in 1998 was 20 years ago is 28 29 years old so in your early 20s you started dude yeah so my day yeah but yeah so I I hit it big in real estate by time I was 26 27 years old just by taking action knocking on a million doors and finally got someone to do a no money down deal with me when I was 20 and then another one and I rolled that to the next deal and next deal and consumers action consistent action and and consistent you know failing and getting back up right the the space between failures is really a huge determining factor of your success right it’s like if you can fail fast you can win quicker right so I remember the first I did to do an infomercial I’m going to write a book on how to make money and go on TV and my family lost their mind like my sister drove from Virginia to sit down with me and say it’s time to get real you you did good you got lucky not lucky you work hard you got here but you’re going to blow it you’re and I remember that defending it that that conversation like it was yesterday which was sister my sister and she did it out of pure love she thought she was protecting me how many people listening right now so we want to listen to you or do something call you listen to that wasting your time just get real you know do something so I remember that conversation and I literally almost gave up on it I remember going to cancel the whole thing and say what am I thinking I I can’t read that good I’m going to write a book and all this stuff and luckily I just remember thinking if I keep these patterns I’m going to continue the same process my family has I want more and we filmed it and showing on TV and you know aired in 1999 I went 17 years straight without missing a day on TV 17 years not missing a dance does it stop now or it stopped because we’re going from my real estate book table so we’re just pausing until this the show I did with Larry King’s gonna roll out here on a millionaire success habit sometimes 17 years yeah I didn’t miss a day on TV was it all throughout the US over the world just us just us yeah Wow and how’d you know is our guy named big was a part of this big yeah big he bought my media gotcha I met him I bought some of my media when we were yeah he’s a great guy zip stickers interesting character I love that guy yes it worked for Mercury media huh and I had three meet at one time when we were really cranking I had three media companies about time fly media for yeah we’re running out of media was converting so well so amazing now is this the same infomercial for 79 so you shouldn’t do that every year really Wow yeah it’s um where was an interview some I drove in my car that was one of my biggest ones I just put a camera on the dash of the the window a windshield and I drove in the car for a half hour and pitched I’d stop it literally I’d stop it street lights and pitch my book I’d stop and then I hold the book up like everybody I’m driving in my house right now in my office but if you want my book call the number waits like screen I got a gash what did you uh what do you how did you think that these infomercials were to do well for you you know you had a good system already you’re making good money why risk something was it Tony is my my if I lost all my money I’d have to blame him hey cuz he was on James on TV and he inspired me I’m like I want to inspire people in my story so I didn’t I I didn’t even know I didn’t know about Direct Mail or the internet really wasn’t there yet there was a oh well dial-up that with you know so wasn’t the internet and I was naive enough I mean I shot the infomercial and then I didn’t know how to get it on TV I was calling like stations and like who books the media how do you get on it like so nice how do I know what formula was gonna work didn’t I didn’t I just watched Tony and I with drives a Saab II try this and I just I remember I was a nervous wreck and scared but my you know there’s a and and I’m happy to talk about me but I really want to serve today I want to I want to give back anything that I can do to help somebody watching right now that wants to get over that obstacle or they feel like they’re at a plateau or just there they know there’s more in the Kami that’s the biggest frustration in life is knowing you have more gas in the tank and you don’t know where to go how to go or get that momentum but I I I digress that I got off track but I guess how did you know what was going to work and how did you tweak it or with her big failures early on in the infomercial yeah yeah that’s it yes sorry sorry yes I I did the infomercial being so naive I had no idea how to get it on and I just and that the part I was going to tell everybody is persistence like I didn’t I literally flew to Arizona to meet a media buyer and I said I have no idea what I’m doing and I just kept pushing in and one of those things that I think during the evolution of growing from wherever you are to where you want to go is do whatever you do best I mean do whatever you’re doing the best you can knowing there’s the bigger horizon so I literally was working during the day on cars I was a paint cars I’ve been doing a collision repair at night I’d go work on my apartments and I was a plumber and and and hung sheetrock and I worked till midnight on houses and I was tired but I had a dream I knew I wanted to help people do better so it made what I was doing okay because I knew there was more so the big problem I see is people want more and they hate what they’re doing so that it they’re in a they’re in a state of mind where god I just when I’m done with this crap and someday I’ll reach my dreams and if you can flop that to go no this is the gateway to my dreams I don’t care that I’m serving coffee or I’m painting cars or I’m a teacher right now or I’m on my sister’s couch like this is what I have to do and I have to do it the best become a master I just become a master at that because and that’s the income and the security and the mindset that fuels the next level it’s not this is miserable I hate it I feel the next level and now I’m amazing it’s like you need to master that yeah the process yeah you got to fall in love with that problem in the evolution yeah failure you’re not gonna have like overnight success you know it took you probably 10 years and see until you got into that that’s like the first time you see an actor and a movie you’re like I never saw that person overnight success like they don’t show the summer stock and all the stuff you know the millions of theatres and no money and all the extra work yes if they’re drinking coffee in the background yeah yeah exactly Wow okay can you share I wasn’t going to ask about this but I’m fascinated about infomercials now since you’ve done over so long is there a formula to like the most successful infomercial like five or six things that you must have yeah you know it’s so funny when I went dead before when my brain there was a thought I had my net never happens because I just got off a plane it might be the Dramamine but I went flat for a second because what I was thinking when I was going to tell you is you said how do you know it was going to work and what I’d share with anybody watching in any kind of marketing or any kind of persuasion or any kind of getting some attracting somebody persuading something to get them to take action when I look back at those original infomercials I had two things going for me I wasn’t the smartest guy in the world struggled reading insecure about that wasn’t college-educated I don’t have a really incredible vocabulary it’s hard for me to articulate certain words because I just they’re not in there yeah right but what I had was is enthusiasm and authenticity when I look back at those infomercials and they hit like monsters I mean one infomercial I did one of the first sit-down in different and infomercials I did to 150 million in sales Wow one infomercial and Halawa period was that about 18 months Wow it’s amazing and I look back at that and I don’t say that to brag and that all that’s not profit you know of course I spent a lot of media so I don’t know anybody I’m not and I barely say anything about money I’m saying it to make an impact because I wasn’t the smartest guy I didn’t go to college I didn’t come from anything most people watching are way further ahead than I was when I started you weren’t training on camera but what I did have is I look back even at those old shows where I’m embarrassed to see myself and my New York accent was like super heavy so I grew up is I had authenticity and enthusiasm and I think people could see this guy really wants to help I wasn’t scripted it wasn’t perfect I stuttered I words wrong I mean I look at some of those I use the wrong words in the wrong context but it’s still converted and as I evolved so I say what’s the foundation like as I evolved and I did the first time I did a sit down Larry King style infomercial he’s the one that gave me the idea for that then I did the one where I was driving in my car the reason I did that driving in my cars I wanted people to know that I wasn’t using a teleprompter wasn’t somebody scripting me there wasn’t a million cuts it was me despised wasn’t produced it was me driving from my office I started it with a backpack I said I’m going home you wanna take a ride with me and I talked till I got home you Briana and my son were probably three and one when I got to the door they came running out that way Marshall that’s cool right and that wasn’t even planned they just ran out was that was home right but I did that because I could tell the authenticity and the enthusiasm I had to change people’s lives there so what I’d say for an infomercial for any kind of marketing for selling yourself you still need the core I mean what I wrote in this book but what you need is the core foundations yeah of of what success are now I would say a couple of things when it comes to persuasion out of all my years of doing this and being lucky to sell I wasn’t a scientist of selling I was just an innate I had an innate ability to sell through that passion and then you get your 10,000 hours in and all the sudden I was good right so on-the-job training of course right or when I look back and if I if I go off in an area that you wanted really back interval back in but people buy from you will love you will learn from you will give you a promotion when they feel understood not when they understand you and that was one of the biggest lessons ever when you watch someone who is so full of knowledge so full of wisdom and wants to sell their product sell themselves get the raise close the deal at the boardroom they’re always want to it just exude who they are their credentials when they have and how they could solve the problem and that will get you so far like being great at sharing who you are will get you out of Egypt understand how people feel and letting them feel understood will get you to the promised land right so when you go to an audience or you’re talking to close a deal most people want to share most the time you just need to be quiet and find what’s going on in that person’s left be be an expert at the temporary state of mind like understand what they’re going through at that minute and let them feel understood when you let people feel understood when someone’s watching you and you do an amazing job dude I’ve been watching you forever I love what you do but when someone watches you and go man that guy gets me he understands where I’m going at he understands my struggles he understands where I want to go that’s someone I can hitch my cart to rather than someone who’s got great content credentials and you can go I understand that person but I don’t think he understands where I’m at right right and so the two things when it comes to an infomercial comes to anything with persuasion the two things I always tell myself is how do I make sure that person feels understood and secondly how do I enter a conversation going on in their mind not mine you know when you want your sisters couch you had different struggles right now I come to Doheny Drive in LA you’re in a completely different world but a slightly different space flying to the White House and all the stuff you’ve got going on the conversations in your head have changed dramatically from when you’re on your sisters couch to now yeah so what happens and I’ve watched this with marketers and people in business as they evolve they hit a certain you remember that pain that passion that the desire for more I mean you could probably close your eyes right now and remember that desire think and am I ever going to make it and and even a little bit of envy for maybe some of your buddies who made it or a little jealousy doesn’t mean you wished ill thoughts on them but it’s like damn it they made it I don’t have it what if I never get it when if you remember that pain if you remember that process you remember that thoughts you will always serve anybody watching who needs that but what happens to some people as they evolve and you’re going to join the country club maybe you’re getting married you’re going to move to the suburbs now you got an accountant and you got two assistants and now should I got a private jet and then as the pilot going to be laid and then and then you know and then you’re like I got a Facebook team should I outsource the Facebook market and all of a sudden your conversations change you get to do an interview or you pitch on camera are you doing infomercial and all of a sudden you’re having conversations in your head and your audience feels disconnected yeah and you don’t even know why like what what did I miss because now you’re asking questions of a completely different group because you’ve evolved so the two things again I always go back to even before I turn a camera on before I go on stage before I do an infomercial I said people buy from you love you adore you will learn from you if they feel understood and I want to enter conversations going on in their heads not mine Wow powerful so too too simple like such simple little things but it’s a foundation for persuasion amazing man so what are some of the habits then that you learned over the years that the millionaire’s have that the rest of people don’t have so this is going to sound this one’s going to sound crazy but this is one that I’ve I shouldn’t say it sounds crazy it sounds too simple but this one has been a passion of mine for the last probably two years more than ever last six months especially I told you before with with being a dad you know you always want to be able to look in the mirror no matter how much money you’re making and what you’re doing for living and look at that person and say are you good with you like are you compromising who you are are you going against your values to be successful but you know you just have to have that conversation of the man in the mirror right yeah but when you have kids it compounds times a thousand anybody watching who knows I know exactly what I’m saying kids don’t do what you say they do what you do so you have somebody watching if I want to be the best dad possible I want to I need to keep evolving and faster than ever so I would say a morning routine this is just one of them that’s been huge in my life is setting my day up for success and and you know in an interview like this there’s so many different directions we can go but I want to give some really strong takeaways here is everybody watching we suffer on all different levels of suffering we some people suffer on a high level some people suffer because is the job going to get done is that is the deal going to come through like we have these moments of suffering no matter if it’s five minutes of suffering or an hour suffering or months of suffering some people lose a relationship and they suffer for years some people have a partner take their money they suffer for years and they’re stuck in that and if you can limit the time you suffer the more you can work on the solutions the better your life people stuck in suffering so we are stuck forever and we know right now I’m saying it you’re thinking of friends that you have that are stuck some they went went went found some suffering and they just crippled moments where I was suffering and I didn’t let go of it you can’t like over I held on to it for long it’s hurt me right and if you hold on to it there’s not enough energy or focus to keep moving forward you could that’s when you’re still right yeah so what I’ve been on this obsession literally Tony Robbins flew out him and I got really close he flew out and him and I had lunch about nine months ago and he’s on the same thing like limiting like complete suffering gone like instead of it hours or weeks it’s moments that you catch it so morning routines helped me more than ever and I’ll tell you mine anybody wants to steal this this works for me because I want to set my days up for least amount of suffering feeling grateful and ready to you know just rock it the day like nothing can get me off now everybody knows gratitude is a key to success happiness joy can’t be grateful in depressed grateful and sad you just can’t do the two together but it’s hard sometimes I feel like the Roadrunners before your time but when I was a kid member beep beep throughout worse there was a Tasmanian devil yep so at most of our lives with Facebook and social media and cell phones and tech we’re like the Tasmanian though there’s so much dust around it’s hard to like see through it right like it’s like I just got to get through this storm and then I’ll be okay how do I you want me to set a goal and be grateful like have this dust storm right so I just obsessed on how do I start my day to make sure it doesn’t happen so one thing I do is at night put your I put my phone on airplane mode and for the last year especially when I wake up in the morning I do not check email or text because I can’t if I check email or text especially in bed right right and and I’ve done it for years I’m not done something I haven’t done but the great text put me a good move bad text I become the refund anxious yeah like I feel like ah you know I should get this done I just get this out of the way right and you become the thermometer of life life just grabbed a hold of you and they’re going to tell you how your day is going to be I don’t know if I’m gonna just yawn the heat up the ice cold or stressed or anxious or so I leave my phone on airplane mode and the first thing I do is I feed my soul right and and that’s not this I’m just being honest I don’t chant I don’t do hours of meditation what I’ve done is I’ve lowered the bar of gratitude now these are habits that you think oh this is revolution these are the habits that I look have made me successful make me keep going for push through the negative times keep reaching for the next thing so I I find gratitude but I’ve lowered the bar and I just said this but I wake up some mornings and like damn these sheets are amazing you know I mean 150 value Google 150 thousand people die every day there’s some days I just wake up and go damn I’m not one of them I’m here and when you can find gratitude on the lowest level pot not I concur I did okay I see your wall you’ve interviewed such amazing people you got to be so proud of yourself I look at it I admire that’s amazing goals but sometimes we just set ourselves up until you get the next one of those pictures up there the rest of stuff is just mundane it’s not where it’s beautiful world were blessed every day we’re learning every moment even an interview like this take take all the stuff I say throw most of it away if you get one thing I say today it was worth your time with us being the other thing just one thing right yeah so I find a way to be grateful in like the first few moments I wake up by lowering the bar no big special thing or sometimes I’ll open a book like I just read the untethered soul for the second time I love that book I’ll read two sentences out loud and then I feed my body so I immediately get up and I do I mean just my personal thing but I do a glass full big glass of water with a lemon a green juice some essential oils and I down next I feel like I’m feeding my body and then I go move whether it’s work out run exercise and someone isn’t working out I just move and those three things set me up for a successful day and then when I get back this is something I’ve been doing for a year and I’d say rob this because there’s things that listen you’re in business there’s things that you love to do it’s your core competency you were put on this earth to do it’s interviewing it’s meeting people it’s networking or whatever you have is meant to be but there’s some things that you do is like I want to do that conference call I want to sit with my accountant and go over numbers and write or whatever it is right and I used to think man I have to do that today and I just switch that in the mornings I write a quick little list every day of what I get to do I just put that word what I get to do when I think about that I I used to I used to literally live in a bathroom with my dad and I in my teens I worked on cars every day and smoked you know smelled fumes because I was like that the rooms were always smoky I was the only one painter in our collision shop and I’d have headaches and like I could be doing that so I have to do conference calls on Tuesdays and out like confidence too because what they do now when I say I get to do conference calls it changes everything that little room got a victim anymore I’m not a victim anymore right and again on every level yeah it makes a difference hmm I love any other have or any other thing in the morning that you you do know that’s it that’s my morning routine are there any non-negotiables everyday for you besides the routine no not really yeah I’m pretty flexible yeah okay cool there’s a part actually that I wanted to go over in your book called seven levels deep so it is yeah and this is an exercise that you do right and what is this exercise for and how ago okay so seven levels deep was probably the biggest impact the biggest thing in the impact of my life ever really yeah one one day so I hired a guy named Joe stumped you know Joe Stumpo great guy he’s in the marketing world but I hired him because I want more engagement with my students so it’s it’s all about if you can get somebody to digest some of your book if somebody will read thirty pages to your book they’ll read the whole book how do you get them to the first 30 pages so I’m always obsessing and trying to create ethical bribes whatever I wrote get you to take action right we know books work it’s the books and the action so I was oh so anyway so Joe comes in and he said I want to do whatever I can and he said have you ever done the seven levels deep mmm I don’t know where he got it from this probably bout eight years ago she was – so about eight years ago and I said if it’s good just give it to me right I’ll take it he’s like I want to go through with you I’m like I listen and and I paid Joe ten grand for half a day of consulting at the time and he’s like I said I want to go through I just want it because I won’t give it to you unless you do it so we sit there and what the seven levels deep is is finding everybody wants to know your purpose and what’swhat’s this meaning of life and what’s my why and all that I get and it’s kind of played out but I don’t know if anything really gets to the heart of the of it as simple as this so what it basically was he’s like why would you give me ten grand for a half a day I said because I want to create a company that stands out from everybody else I want to engage more students change more lives and he basically said to me that’s a really great answer so I asked you why I’m here and you said you want to engage more students and get more people to change your life so why is it important for you to engage more students and change people’s lives and I remember saying you know there’s a lot of people in this industry that shouldn’t be here and there’s some great people I want to help rise all boats of the good and push the rest down I want to leave a legacy for my kids so he said okay I asked you why you pay me ten grand I’m not gonna go through this whole thing and he’s like you did this you know you said you wanted to stand out and you want to leave a legacy so why is it important to leave a legacy and the whole point is asking the previous question seven times mmm I took that that day by the time I got to the third question what happens is the third when there was three questions left I should say ask me four times it switched from my head to my heart and I felt my physiology change I felt my emotions change I felt like tears welling up and when he asked me and I didn’t remember what the fourth thing I said but the third thing I said was I never want to go backwards and he got me thinking about things I haven’t thought about years I didn’t like being the kid with hand-me-downs and I’d make my parents drop me off down the street with her junky car and I’d go to lunch and this is not a poor me I I life was designed to be exactly the way it was I wouldn’t be the man or the father I am today but there was days I’d go to school without lunch money and I just tell my buddies I’m not hungry because we’re gonna have a buck right so I never want to go back there and I felt that emotion and it it hit me so hard I’m like that’s what it is and he’s like well there’s two more left so he said Dean why is it important that you never go backwards and I got I don’t know and it hit me and I thought my kids I I just want to give them options I don’t want to raise entitled kids or brats but I want to give them options that I didn’t have and I’m like that’s it so he’s like well that’s not really a 7 it’s not nine it’s not five and seven levels deep and by now I’m crying so I’m thinking about my kitchen really and I got half my staff there and I’m like just weeping and it came to me he said why is that important and it just hit me and I never knew why I worked so hard since I was cutting firewood and high school and did all stuff I said I need to be in control of my life and these emotions flooded in my pepper buddies got the thing right but for me and I’m saying this because I want you at home to be or when you’re watching us listen is I realized that my parents were married nine times when I was a kid so I moved 20 times by the time I was 19 different stepbrother steps both parents were married five for my dad five for my mom for four my gosh yeah it’s crazy always moving like military kids know what that feels like right so I’d be in a cul-de-sac with a new stepdad stepbrother stepsisters have the ball one day and my bombs like we’re moving again and then I’m moving my dad moving on my grandma so I had this crazy hopscotch up my whole certainty there was no certainty so what I realized at that moment Lilly I’m balling loose I mean like literally crying it’s like I don’t want anybody to ever tell me when to move how to dress how to live how to work who how I’m gonna raise my kids it’s definitely not going to kiss somebody’s ass from right right and I realized at that moment my why was I don’t to be a control freak I just want to be in control when I was 27 I retired both my parents I stopped worried about them I took care of my grandmother take care of something so I got those problems out of the way and why I anchored that in and you watching at home it’s like if you think you’re watching this because you want to be a notch anywhere you want or you already are if you’re watching as you’re already had great success in your life you want that next level or maybe it’s income or or a better health a better diet or better physiology whatever it is you want so many times we think it’s because I want to get out of that job I want this freedom I just want more money I want to take the better vacations and it’s seven times deeper than that mmm and when you find that and the reason I know this not only because it wasn’t just transformable to me transformational to me is I did live events in Las Vegas for six years straight every single month there was 400 people in the room that paid 20 grand to go to real estate events right so about five and a half years I did him every month in Las Vegas so once a month I’d fly in and that was like the highest level and I every single month I’d raise I’d get pick somebody out of the audience and I’d say come on up let’s do the seven levels deep like I got it man I know what it is and I’m like okay so like I’m gonna give you a quick example I won’t beat this up but this is so important because when you feel fatigued when you want to say no when you don’t want to go to the gym when you don’t want to make that sales call when you don’t want to get your funnel working when you don’t want to start new when you don’t want to say no to someone you should say no to or say yes to someone else you should say yes to literally for me still I fall back on my why when I think of my kids and going backwards and being a control I could push through anything nothing will stop me a bad day I don’t know what it’s like to be sick because my mind I can program my brain to just power through because I focus foundationally on this why right so I get I remember this guy who’s also this big dude dreadlocks he’s like six foot seven I mean six foot five is huge it’s awesome dude he comes up he’s like man I like pick me up he gives us big hugs so I said why are you here he’s like I already know dude you’re not going to get seven levels on me you’re not gonna I’ve already done the exercise I’m here because in my neighborhood there’s no dad’s there’s not enough dad’s in my neighborhood I grew up without a dad these kids need dads so I’m making money in real estate and I’m starting this youth group I already had debt we get dads together and we go spend these days he had to hear this amazing story I mean I melted on the first one I said Hawai is that important he goes dude what do you mean why is that important he of course it’s important and he’s laughing he’s joke and he gives me another reason I want more money cuz I want to build a building for it but I could tell he was still in his head he gets the number two or one and his ever thing changed on him he gets small and he starts crying I mean like uncontrollable crying and he gets to his number one he’s like my mom raised a good boy but when she died nine years ago I was a drug addict and she never saw the man she created and she said I’m showing her in heaven what a man she I’m saying right now Wow physical good he said that and I said he said I’ll never stop now I’ll never stop and again we all have our own reasons for doing stuff but when you get to the heart of why you’re watching why you do what you do it’s so much deeper than what you think and I forget sometimes that I hope I don’t sit here and feel like seem like I got my life all figured out and blessed to have more I’ve had more blessings in my life than I ever could imagine if somebody would have told me at 25 this is where I’d be I’d say impossible it’s it so I appreciate my blessings but I’m not I’m not perfect at all this stuff but when I practice these habits when I think through this one I recognize my why the days that I’m off-track the days I think I bit off more than I can chew or the days where I feel like I’ve plateaued when I go back to that why it’s like game over and you’re not getting in my way nothing is mmm Wow got me emotional what is the I mean you’ve achieved so much over the years you know you said in the first 18 months 150 million in sales you know that was 20 years ago and the things you’ve created now yeah 10 years ago things have created now you’ve created so much you’ve been packaged so many lives it sounds like you don’t need to work or need to keep pushing but why do you what’s the dream and why do you keep going after so I think it’s three things so real quick I think there’s three types of entrepreneurs there’s an entrepreneur who wants to work under the blanket of someone else right there the company third person it’s in a company like man that guy that woman she just they want to rise up through the ranks and be an entrepreneur but kind of with the safety net and it doesn’t make them better worse than anybody I mean without the implementers in life without the team who would I be without the amazing people in my team secondly there’s lifestyle entrepreneurs like my buddy Dean Jackson he’s got this I know I’m being successful when let’s go for anybody’s got a lifestyle on for there’s just a certain amount of money he says I know I’m being successful when I don’t I don’t have an alarm clock in my house and it never goes off my black t-shirts every day and no one gives a shit I golf you know I golf at least five times a week I live a $50,000 a month net income I live like what he say I live like an artist with a trust fund except I don’t know how to paint he’s a hit so he like he has this listing knows being successful when and that’s that’s lifestyle entrepreneur and then there’s entrepreneurs that just want to keep that just one other accomplishment based has nothing to do with the money they thought it was mine think this for me they thought it was when I get the money and success out of the way that I could stop worrying and it’s not it’s the next accomplishment what can you do this but it’s yeah it’s the game and I think it converts that’s why you see something like Richard Branson that that his whole life now is Virgin Unite you know his charity I’d spent a couple weeks with the mountain his Island cuz we me and Joe polish raised a million bucks warm so we got to spend time with him and he started that same process made all the money and then now he still driven but now it’s how many more schools he can build in Africa so it never changes it just but always have your focus on something like you see people who go to you know Warren Buffett is AG still crushing because he has a bigger purpose we always have to have that so I would say yeah I you know a couple years ago especially when the kids are young I was thinking of should I just cash out and spend ten years being dad but I would I wouldn’t be the best me I loved accomplishing I love creating I love something new you know so hmm what do you want to accomplish in your life what’s the big thing the big thing is that you know I’m first and foremost I’d love to say it’s you know I’d say top two is showing people easier path I think most people are they’re driving a hundred miles an hour and they don’t know where to go it’s like even if they got a Ferrari engine they don’t have any GPS and it’s like everybody’s going fast and most of the time they think it’s going to be this dramatic spectacular thing and a lot of things it’s the same thing that they could learn from Dale Carnegie or Earl Nightingale or Napoleon Hill or or somebody you know it’s just the simple core things that can make them slow down and achieve and I think that I can I think I have the ability to deliver a message in a way that it sticks and that’s what I’ve been blessed doing real estate is it’s not that I had found the only way to make money in real estate but I’m the I was the biggest real estate educator in the entire world it was nobody even close to me was like second second through 20th place didn’t make up the corner I did right right and there was other guys that were great at education I just think I found a way to deliver it it’s probably because of my dyslexia my learning disabilities and stuff I found a way to give people recipes so I would say the big fuel is is getting people these strategies in their hands so they could see there’s a better way but the number one is is to just be a totally present and impactful father like I said it’s just where I’m at and it’s magical age anybody who’s watching it members their kids eight ten years old it’s like they’re just it’s all I’m still Superman they still love it two three years ago absorb it while I can you know that’s a couple years I might have a you know a new you know thing for trying to get teenagers to like yourself that I don’t know yeah sure what’s the thing people miss understand about you the most um I would takes I did infomercials for year mean years Tony and I had this conversation a lot of times when somebody sees you on an infomercial it’s like oh that guy’s I you know I guys got to be a huckster he’s just slapping books on a on an infomercial so I think the biggest misconception is that I’m an introvert when I’m on stage or on camera or an interview I love it but if I go to my kids school function there’s a whole bunch of people around on the one hide in the rear or playing with the kids I’m not a networker I’ve never had a business card in my entire life and I think some people when they see that if they’re looking from afar if they don’t come up and shake my hand people will say oh that guy he’s he’s too good for everybody hasn’t talked to me I really don’t know I’m I’m hiding sure right so I would say that and and I think the infomercial think you know I’ll give I got it just one more thing about Tony Robbins the first time I met him about five years ago I go up to his hotel room he’s doing a date with destiny invites me up for lunch and I get there and we’re talking for like 15 minutes and he stands up but he picks up and he gives me a hug and he says I gotta apologize to you he’s like I almost canceled this meeting today because you’re an infomercial guy and he goes I made a judgement and he goes what an ass because I was the infomercial yeah because I’ve been trying to run away from it because people look at you and wonder and he said and I judged you wrong and we’ve been really close since then so I think that those two things are probably the biggest hmm Wow hmm I’m surprised you still do infomercials then if you think so many people you know yeah you know what so I I don’t mind because it’s all about the message I want to get my message out there I’ve been off TV for two and a half years on purpose by choice um but with millionaire success habits I just I ran across Larry King who’s a big impact in my life we met I said you want to do a show you’re the one who inspired me to do sit down so he interviewed you he interviewed me and the funny things so I’m gonna digress here for a minute yeah I dress on two things are really funny so eight nine years ago I’m watching Larry King interviewed Joel Osteen mm-hmm he says the job I’m guessing nine nine ten years ago he says the Joel I’m a Jew I don’t believe in Jesus that mean I’m going to hell like oh my god could you imagine getting to ask that on Larry King well there’s millions of people watching Joel like turn different colors you didn’t know how to answer and and if you don’t know Joel Osteen is like the biggest pastor in the world right so I see that I remember thinking oh my god could you imagine if Larry just looked at the camera and said hey like Joel or not if you’d like to get his book call our show and that’s what inspired me to do Larry King show I thought so I raced and I built a set like Larry King I spent 4 grand Fox verygames microphone right I did all this stuff I do an interview that was my big break out show that’s when my company went from 1015 million years we broke 100 million dollars in a year within 18 months because that sit down live I spent the other guys like the bald guy or the bald guy forgot through the years but we did all these different so I say that and so Larry King inspired me to do that it was just the chain now everybody does sit-down interviews but I was the first one out there and the first one who sold a book by infomercial the infomercial direct-to-consumer so we sell the book Larry makes an impact in my life he doesn’t know it fast forward years now Larry comes I have used that set in ages we wheel it back out coz Larry’s coming right to do this interview and I’m I’m nervous like I’m a little kid Larry coming I mean I know you know Larry Ariston right here what I could have yeah yeah so Larry comes and he gets there and we go to dinner that night the next day he comes in the studio and I’m telling him this story and as it he’s kind of not paying attention to me he looks over he goes you know the mic is supposed to be here no way know that I was just like oh this is so easy and we just rift he goes you have questions for me I said here’s my goal Larry I do I have all your questions and are loaded on the teleprompter but why don’t you just start the show like you always start shows when you say somebody why this book why now he used to say that all the time and he goes Dean you don’t need this why the hell you doing a book now and we just rift for half-hour and so that everybody watching you guys will see that show it’s there’s no pre and there’s no questions he really used all properties just kind of went off one or two it yeah and we rocked it and the show tested its solid it’ll be out in February so can I tell you a really funny story Jerry if you he is a he’s an amazing joke teller amazing joking storyteller oh my god there’s nobody better in the show’s four days yeah and and I don’t know if you know who harvey mackay is yes women sharks so last Friday Larry came to my office and Harvey’s there Wow there for two hours on between these two 83 and 84 years old they got more history and story and they’re just outdoing each other with stories it’s nonstop and I just and it look at me and I’m like I got nothing just you guys are perfect so Larry’s Larry for like all the years he’s doing my with Larry King they have this they have he has a producer who’s like a practical prankster and he said but big time really good at what he does he said anytime that someone was in the office a little off herb or grumpy they’d get him so he said they had this guy I don’t know what department but he was kind of a pain the ass for lack of a better worker so they wanted to get him so the guy came in every day structured he came in his briefcase his hat his overcoat he hang his hat hang his overcoat up and go to work so they went and found the Hat the exact hat and bought one two sizes too small micro so every day he’d come in they let him go for a week word could have put the hat on no way he couldn’t get over his head like me I’d have to tell the guy like in a day so the guys freaked out he’s coming in off like just off he thinks his head smart girl so then they didn’t just leave it down like then you told him he goes no because then we bought a hat two sizes too big sure I left that there for weekend he said he was rolling up paper and stuffing it no way and I’m like oh my god I mean but Larry tells that story is so amazing and then they finally told him after two weeks that’s hilarious anyway may digress is just a funny story no it’s amazing um is there any question they wish more people would ask you and but they don’t ask god that’s a really good that’s a really good question um yeah probably how to get you know I I think and I watch this when we we did the fundraiser with Richard Branson we went there I watched everybody trying to ask him like how did you get to be a billionaire and I don’t I think that’s the wrong question when you see somebody successful I think it’s I think it’s more of like asking them what their why was or how they overcame obstacles or how they persevered so I think and I don’t think it’s about our it’s about the story it’s just I think so many people give up on the five-yard line I think I think so many of you are just there and you think it’s so much heavier it when you start playing at a higher level there’s not a lot of competition no and it’s not doing I’m not doing much different I’m just being honestly I’m not doing much different now than I did start my collision shop start my auto sales I’m doing the same thing just on a bigger scale I still have to overcome negativity I still have to get out of bed I still am stressed some days and there’s some days I question myself there some days I make bad decisions and it’s just how are you get over them how you handle it and how you go forward is is everything and and you say that I’m talking and thinking at the same time and I don’t know how much time we have left but I would say the last thing or one of the last things I’d love people to really think about is their thoughts you have your read the untethered soul no it’s a God put on your list it’s an I’m about Eckhart Tolle the power now sure you read that help yes okay so an untethered soul is for me it’s it’s that and so much more it’s a great book so I know if you had another question so I think so I’ll reframe that it’s that one yeah but if there’s one specific question I’d love for people say how do you be the observer of your thoughts and that’s something how do you yeah and that’s something I would I would I always I say this because I’ve been obsessed with it for the last three years because I want to be the observer of thoughts immediately and I’m not there yet I wanted to trigger because when you’re having a bad day an angst a a stressful day you feel off or overwhelmed most the time it’s just the thoughts we’re having in that particular day and when you can look back and view those thoughts you can make a decision to throw them out or not let that spin you up or feel it for 10 minutes and then throw it out but when you leave them there they just linger and the more I’ve become aware of my thoughts mmm the more I’ve evolved as a person so again I’m sitting here because my daughter you’re probably bored to death on love you doing great over there I’m gonna tell a story about her I am trying to observe my thoughts as they happen so I don’t know if she’ll remember this but we were we were and I’m sharing this is my story but I want you to put yourself in these shoes this could be your husband your wife your kids your co-worker your partner people you do business with employer employees but we’re at breakfast and breakfast is really important to our family we have breakfast every single day and and I cook for them most of the time and so we sit at breakfast and try to have conversations about gratitude all those kind of stuff and my son Brody was obsessed with these crayons and they were like these crazy colors they weren’t red they were like aqua blue more wringing something so I’m sitting there using them and and I pull and I go god this is a cool color and he names it and tennis for a reason so I pull out another he names all I was 25 or 50 in that pack so he names all of them these big long names I’m like dude what an incredible gift I couldn’t memorize these if I spent a month trying my about my brain things but that’s him he’s this structured organized kid so Bri she says to me I could do that so I don’t know if you remember this honey but she studied it and like five minutes late on the second one she didn’t remember I’m like we’re all blessed with different gifts I couldn’t he does that but she my daughter is the inventor she comes up with ideas that are real not not kid invention she’s going to be amazed going to be the visionary my son’s gonna be the implementer if you had rocket fuel that’s the two kids I have implementer in a visionary right so when she tried all of a sudden she got upset and started almost crying and she said because there’s so much attention going to my son of course she says dad it’s because you spend more time with Brody than me in the mornings mm-hmm and I remember just having the immediate thought that may have came from my dad or the way I was brought up and I said to her breed don’t lie to me and don’t lie to yourself that’s not true I I worked my butt off to be completely equal and you’re telling yourself a lie it’s not a good story and I went on this rant and she tucked it up she stopped tears she sucked up it was the first time ever that she left the house without kissing me goodbye mmm ever and I’m like well she just got to learn that lesson yeah and she left for about a half hour and I like it hit me like a ton of bricks like I observed that thought I had and what I basically told my daughter is that I didn’t give a shit about her feelings that it didn’t matter how she felt right that dad was right tuck it down I said if she was married to a man I watched her try to tell her husband about her feelings how she was feeling and he basically told her to shut up and tuck it down I’d have a talk with that dude right if he’s married to my daughter and I treated my daughter that way I got in my car because I only because I’m sharing this because I practiced trying to observe what’s going on why am I feeling this way what is this thought I’m having step back look at it when I stepped back and looked at I knew I screwed up I drove the school 100 miles an hour even if you were right even if I was right now I was not about it I might have been right that I keep equal time yes but I didn’t acknowledge her feelings exactly I didn’t know knowledge of feelings I mean and that’s the gift of selling it’s not what people need it’s what they want how they feel right so I told her feelings I drove to her school 100 miles an hour you were at chapel the member I came and got you out of Chapel I got her out of Chapel and I walked her outside I said dad screwed up I said I may have been right in context but I wasn’t right in telling you your emotions mean something your feelings means something and we had a great talk we hugged we kissed her and I had the best relationship in the world and and I left and I felt amazing and she felt amazing and I never would have caught that if I wasn’t observing my thoughts so I say that story about my family my daughter sitting here right now but who and who you not you know what thoughts are clouding your judgment in a marriage or in a relationship or in your partnership or trying to get a raise or taking your life to another level whatever it is in your life most the time it’s those thoughts that are messing with us and if you could you can observe them you can adjust them amazing man I’ve got a few final questions for you this has been great this one’s called the three truths ok so it’s many many years down the line you’ve achieved everything you want but it’s your last day it’s your last day here ok and you know it’s the last day whole your whole family is there friends everything for whatever reason all your books have been erased from time and I’ve sold hundreds of millions of them at this point they’re all gone ok and someone of your family comes up and says I have a piece of paper and a pen and all you get to do is write down three things you know to be true about everything you’ve experienced in your life the three simple truths or the three lessons that is all we remember you by physically all the stuff in the books is gone what would be the three truths for you um wow what a great question I’m glad I didn’t know that one advanced because I would have thought about oh that’s really good I think the three truths are that it’s not the objects it’s the things that we get to experience so you can’t buy your way I had a lot of pain as a kid which we all did it I know I thought for a time in my life that money would fix that and there’s nothing more than the experience my daughter’s on her first trip with me as a business trip this will last this is worth millions to me I’d give up all my books to have that so it’s the it’s the moments and the experience not the things is one I would say then I lived true okay this is a really good question sorry it’s all good but I would say success is easier than people think like I I think I like there’s a lot of days I’m like man once if we’re going to figure out I’m not that smart okay I’m just being honest I literally for years outside people are gonna fear I’m not that smart I’m just enthusiastic and and you know and I have the momentum and so I would say that that truth is don’t be over-prepared be overly enthusiastic and committed I would say last is that I found a way to not to let thoughts be things not Who I am if thoughts can be automatically a thing but not Who I am and my soul then I thought I lived a good life mMmmm those are great shoes thank you before I ask the final question on technology for a moment dean for your incredible generosity and your enthusiasm for wanting to impact so many people thank you from a guy that has gone through so much pain and suffering to a person who’s led a life of service and constantly pushing the envelope and showing what’s possible for people like me who are dyslexic as well and who barely you know got through high school and college myself seven years of college you’re such an inspiration every time I see your message or see you in person you’re always smiling and happy and want to give to people thank you so I wanna acknowledge you for all those groups thank you and I give that back that’s why I’m here because I love what you’re doing and then don’t don’t stop keep pushing yeah no matter what it takes get it out there I appreciate it Thank You Man appreciate you we have one final question but make sure you go get millionaire success habits go get the book where’s the link for it again you of course it’s on iTunes but we set up a special link at MSH book.com MSH yeah our success habits ms book calm awesome we’ll have that linked up in the show notes and where do you like to hang out the most online do you spend time on social media at all yourself not much a little bit on Facebook a little bit on Instagram but okay I’ll link it up there in the show as well and the final question is what’s your definition of greatness just going at it full Full Tilt boogie a buddy of mine used to say when I was in high school used to say when he’s playing football if you had a great day and I was Full Tilt boogie I don’t even know what that means but I think definition of greatness is just knowing that you gave it your all and I think so many people on that last when you’re 90 years old and you look back if you say if you don’t if you didn’t give it your all I think that’s gonna be one of those things like I had one shot at this why didn’t I just go for it why didn’t I say yes why didn’t I finally say no so I think greatness is just freakin putting the pedal to the metal mmm Dean thanks thanks fun appreciate being sure appreciate it

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